I generally use this blog for posts about writing. Well, I
put my writing on hold for a little while because I’ve had a welcome
distraction—a baby! Writing with a newborn in the house has had its own
challenges, but it’s not impossible. After a month-long hiatus from hacking
away at character development and story-building, I’m finally back in the swing
of things. Being responsible for a baby means I’m not writing as often as I used
to, but I’m grateful that I’m at least writing. I’m about 13,000 words into my
latest work-in-progress, and I couldn’t be more excited about the direction it’s
taking.
During my month of not writing, I was trying to learn how to
be a mother. What a change that’s been! While the first month of motherhood
didn’t contribute greatly to writing novels, it did give me some perspective
about raising a child. And what’s a writer to do but write about her
experiences? So without further ado, here’s what I learned in my first month of
being a mom:
- Keeping a baby entertained while he's awake is extremely difficult when he has the attention span of a goldfish and can only see 12 inches in front of his face.
- If I could kick as much as my newborn, I'd have the strongest stomach muscles in the world. (I've tried. It's impossible.)
- Sometimes babies only calm down if you confuse them. If that means throwing them into the air or crying back into their face, then so be it.
- A baby fist is almost impossible to unclench, especially at bath time and when he has a handful of your hair. This makes baby fists a storage space for lint balls.
- Burp cloths are the best gift known to man. Regardless of how much they protect my clothes, the amount of laundry that needs to be done increases dramatically after a baby is born.
- Baby acne is a totally real thing and makes an infant look like a mix between an awkward teenager and Frankenstein (but don’t tell him I said that!).
- Your partner will be utterly disappointed when he realizes he can't calm the baby as well as you simply because he doesn't have boobs.
- My baby's life goal is to eat, and he will headbang relentlessly against anything and everything until that happens.
- He will pee on you the second you uncover his penis, no matter what tricks you think you have up your sleeve.
- People LOVE to give blankets as baby gifts, but there are only so many blankets you can use.
- When people say they want to come over to help with the baby, it really means they want to cuddle with him and hand him back to you at the first sign of trouble.
- I am uncomfortable admitting how often my boobs are hanging out when I'm sitting around at home. That being said, power-feeding throughout the day is the key to getting a decent-night's sleep.
- An eating baby is one of the most innocent things you will ever see.
- And, most importantly: Generic baby wipes are a waste of money.
